Thursday, 27 February 2020

Anxiety Diaries - 1

Anxiety attack came as a shock to me three years back. I am married, working and have two kids.
Big question arise how I landed in this condition. I myself didn't had answer and my journey started as a anxiety patient for years.

Admitted to hospital twice in emergency due to severe or almost not able to breathe condition.

Deprived of basic necessity as a human being to breathe, what more worst can happen to a person?

But totally unaware what has happened to me, where it will take me. Will I again lead a normal human life?

Initially I was not able to accept the truth. Was in denial state for months but repeated attacks made me accept the reality and  I started searching answer for my queries with psychiatric and people around me.

Doctor advised me to start breathing exercise with medicine. I started meditation and yoga but horribly failed, again got back to medicines. Life was much dependent on medicine, was carrying the medicine where ever i went.

Checked with some people but all in vain, no proper response. At one point I felt I am the first person who has this issue. While reading on net I came through a blog written by a lady with same condition, that was the first soothing or relaxing thing for me in a span for six month.

Whichever method I was trying failed for me but worked for others.

It really takes a lot of effort to accept that you have failed again get up and try without any confirmation that it will work. I always with a ray of hope tried, may be it will work. As months and years were passing, I kept on putting effort. No one to share my struggles and understand.



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